Why Won’t My Baby Stop Crying? 7 Things To Check Before You Panic

Why Won’t My Baby Stop Crying? 7 Things To Check Before You Panic

There’s a special kind of dread that hits at 2 a.m. when your baby has been crying for so long you lose track of time.

You’ve tried feeding. You’ve changed the diaper. You’ve rocked until your arms are jelly. And they’re still screaming like the world is ending. I remember standing in the hallway once, lights half off, holding my baby while she wailed into my shoulder and thinking, “There is no way this is normal. I must be doing something wrong.”

If that’s you right now, hear me: you’re not broken and your baby isn’t broken. Babies cry. A lot. But there are a few very specific things you can check before you spiral into full‑on panic‑googling.

Let’s walk through them like we’re sitting at your kitchen table, both a little sleep deprived, trying to make sense of this tiny loud roommate.

1. Start with the obvious: could they still be hungry?

I used to assume “I just fed her, it can’t be hunger.” Then my pediatrician gently told me, “Babies don’t read the schedule.”

Growth spurts, cluster feeding, random hungry days. It’s all normal.

A quick check:

• Offer a small top‑off feed.
• If they latch or take the bottle and start to settle, hunger was at least part of it.
• If they arch away, push the nipple out, or keep crying through the feed, move down the checklist.

You’re not “spoiling” a newborn by feeding on demand. You’re responding to a brand‑new body that’s doing wild development in a tiny amount of time.

If part of your stress is how much formula or extra snacks are doing a number on your budget, you’re not alone. When I finally sat down and looked at where our money was going, I realized we had leaks everywhere, not just baby stuff, which is exactly what I talk about in where does my money go? find your budget leaks in 30 minutes.

2. Check the comfort basics: diaper, clothes, temperature

I know this sounds insultingly simple, but when you’re exhausted, you skip obvious stuff.

Run through a quick comfort scan:

• Diaper: is it wet, poopy, or maybe just on too tight? Sometimes it’s one tiny smear in a weird place.
• Clothes: is a snap digging into their belly, is a neck tag scratchy, are socks too tight? Zip‑up pajamas are your friend.
• Temperature: feel their chest or back, not just hands and feet. You want warm, not sweaty.

My daughter absolutely hated being a little too warm. I kept over‑bundling her because I was terrified of her being cold, and she’d scream until I stripped her down to a lighter onesie. Once I calmed down about “perfect” baby outfits and focused on actual comfort, her crying spells got shorter.

If you’re in a tiny space and trying to make it function, you might like what I share in how I finally made our small space work instead of just feeling cramped. The less clutter I had around the changing area, the less frantic I felt dealing with diapers at 3 a.m.

3. Gas and burps: the tiny bubble nobody warned you about

Think about chugging sparkling water too fast and that sharp bubble pain in your chest. Babies get that level of discomfort from just… existing.

Signs it might be gas or trapped air:

• Pulling their legs up toward their tummy
• Arching their back during or right after feeds
• Lots of grunting, squirming, or sudden cries a few minutes after eating

What usually helps:

• Burp them longer than you think you need to. I’m talking a solid 3–5 minutes, not 30 seconds.
• Try different burp positions: over the shoulder, sitting upright with your hand supporting their chest, belly‑down along your forearm.
• Gentle bicycle legs when they’re lying on their back.
• If your pediatrician says it’s okay, you can ask about gas drops or gripe water.

I remember the first time I stuck with burping past my usual “ok, she’s fine” point. She let out this ridiculous grown‑man burp and then went completely limp and quiet on my shoulder. I realized I’d been cutting this step short for weeks.

This is a perfect place in the article for a little “tools that help with gas” section with AFFI product boxes: 

4. Overtired is real (and it looks like “wired and wild”)

This one took me forever to understand. I kept thinking, “she’s fussing, maybe she needs more play time.” Nope. She needed sleep about 30 minutes ago.

Overtired babies often:

• Rub their eyes or ears
• Zone out and then suddenly flip into meltdown mode
• Get that wild, flailing, can’t‑settle energy
• Fight sleep even though you know they’re exhausted

What helped us:

• Respecting short wake windows when she was tiny (like 60–90 minutes awake, then back down).
• Starting our wind‑down earlier than felt necessary.
• Doing the same simple steps every time: diaper, dim lights, feed, white noise, sleepy snuggles, then down.

If your evenings already feel like a circus, adding a predictable reset routine helps a ton. My whole house calmed down once I started doing a 10‑minute closing shift at night. It wasn’t just good for the kitchen, it kind of reset my brain before another night of baby wake‑ups.

White noise machines, blackout curtains, and a comfy but not huge rocking chair are great AFFI targets here

5. Too much stimulation, not enough quiet

We forget how loud and bright the world is when you’re a few weeks old.

Common overstimulation culprits:

• TV or tablet on constantly in the background
• Overhead lights on full blast in the evening
• Too many people passing the baby around
• Loud toys right in their face

If your baby was sort of okay, then you went to Target, your in‑laws came over, the dog lost its mind, and then suddenly your baby will not stop screaming… yeah. Their nervous system is done.

How to reset:

• Turn off the TV and loud music.
• Dull the lighting a bit.
• Take them to a quieter room, even just the hallway or bathroom with the fan on.
• Hold them close against your chest where they can’t see everything.

Honestly, this is where your environment matters a lot. When I finally decluttered our living areas using the same “easy wins first” approach I share in what to declutter first when you’re overwhelmed, evenings felt way less chaotic, and I swear my baby picked up on that.

6. Pain, illness, or “something feels off”

Let’s talk about the part that makes your heart race.

Sometimes crying is just crying. Sometimes it’s their only way to say, “Hey, this actually hurts.”

Red flags where you call the pediatrician or nurse line ASAP:

• Fever in a young baby (follow your doctor’s exact guidance here)
• Struggling to breathe, wheezing, or sucking in around the ribs
• Refusing all feeds over multiple hours
• Vomiting more than normal spit‑up
• Very few wet diapers
• A rash that’s spreading or looks angry

Also: that gut feeling you can’t shake. If your brain keeps whispering, “This feels different,” listen to that. I’d rather be the mom who went in and it was nothing than the mom who stayed home to avoid being “dramatic.”

You’re already doing mental math about the cost of co‑pays and meds, I know. If money stress is adding to your anxiety, some of the mindset in the brutally honest budget that finally worked after I failed 12 times might help alongside the practical baby stuff.

7. Check on the parent: are you completely overwhelmed?

I saved this for last, but honestly it could go first.

I used to think “the baby is crying, I just have to power through.” But babies pick up on our stress. If your shoulders are at your ears, your jaw is clenched, and you’re silently screaming inside, they feel some of that.

Signs you need a reset:

• You’re starting to feel angry at the baby
• You catch yourself thinking “I can’t do this” on repeat
• You’re crying while they’re crying
• You haven’t had a real break in… you don’t even know how long

What you can do, even solo:

• Put baby safely in the crib or bassinet.
• Set a 5‑minute timer.
• Step into another room, or even just sit on the floor and breathe.
• Text someone “it’s a hard night, please remind me this is temporary.”

A crying baby in a safe crib for five minutes is not a crisis. A baby in the arms of a parent who’s about to snap is.

If you feel like your whole life is spinning, not just this one baby thing, that’s exactly the kind of moment I wrote about in the evening routine that saved my sanity. It’s not about perfection, it’s about tiny things that make you feel like a person again.

This is also where your softer guides like Mindful Moments or Quietly Becoming can slide in naturally. A quiet, honest ebook you can read with one hand while feeding at 3 a.m. is sometimes more helpful than another “expert” book.

A few tools that actually helped on the longest nights

Products don’t fix everything, but a few things genuinely made our nights less brutal.

When nothing “works” and they still cry

Some nights you will run this entire checklist, do everything “right,” and your baby will still have a rough night.

That doesn’t mean you failed.

Sometimes babies just have hard days. Sometimes their nervous system is doing its own weird growth spurt. Sometimes there’s no clear reason and your only job is to keep them safe and loved while you ride it out together.

If this is every single night and you feel yourself slipping toward a dark place, please talk to your doctor about postpartum anxiety or depression. It’s way more common than people admit, and it does not make you a bad mom.

If it’s just “this week has been brutal,” then you’re allowed to say that out loud too. Ask for help. Lower the bar. Let the dishes sit and lean on quick cleaning routines like the 15‑minute daily cleaning routine that actually keeps my house clean instead of trying to do everything.

You’re learning a brand new person while also learning a brand new version of yourself. That’s a lot.

Your baby crying doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means they’re tiny and human and figuring out this whole being‑alive thing. You’re doing the same.

One feeding, one nap attempt, one long weird night at a time.